11 October 2008

All Puns Intended

These are terrible but thought I'd share a couple:
  • A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident.He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!"The doctor replied, "I know, I amputated your arms!"
  • Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lita fire in the craft. Not surprisingly it sank, proving onceagain that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
  • A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel, andwere standing in the lobby discussing their recenttournament victories. After about an hour, the manager cameout of the office, and asked them to disperse. "But why,"they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said. "I can'tstand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."
  • Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of thetime, which produced an impressive set of calluses on hisfeet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frailand with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. Thismade him (oh, man, this is so bad, it's good) ... asuper-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
  • A dwarf, who was a mystic, escaped from jail. The callwent out that there was a small medium at large.

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